Johnny Trigger

Motherfuckers, let's talk Johnny Trigger. I fucking wonder if that's a name of a motherfucker, a name of the site, and what's fucking cooking underneath.

I don't actually overthink before I start writing. I ain’t done no deep research, I don’t sniff around or jerk off to the homepage before I write this shit. I like to keep it raw, no lube, no prep. Just how your slutty stepmom likes it. I don't know shit about vip.johnnytrigger.com, yet. I'm gonna start revealing pretty damn, soon, so stay around.

Real straight guys seduced

Yeah, I load vip.johnnytrigger.com and the first thing I see is the note - real straight guys seduced. Are those guys turned into gays? If yes, that's a proper horror story for someone of my caliber. I fucking live for pussy. You could tie a fat diamond-encrusted cock ring to your nuts and wave it in my face. I still ain’t switchin’ teams! Go fuck yourself with a traffic cone! Just saying.

That ominous sentence goes on, saying the following - jocks getting rimmed, married men serviced, rednecks, thugs, and so on. My jaw hit the goddamn floor. I don’t shock easy, alright? I’m The Fuckin’ Porn Dude! I’ve watched more twisted shit than you've had hot meals, but this caught me off guard. I fucking loved it.

So I keep scrolling, and finally, this Johnny Trigger guy shows up at the bottom. Ugly as sin, but he’s got that big dick energy. Respect. He says vip.johnnytrigger.com is packed with sloppy amateur porn, blowjobs that go on for fucking hours, tongue-deep rimming, bros jerking each other off, gangbangs, open-air cockfests, gloryhole sucking, and hardcore porn. I'm sitting here like FUCK yes! This site's got potential. Bring on the cock carnage!

Live shows for you sick fucks

I snoop around and find this drop-down menu in the site's upper left corner. It opens shit like livestream, stories, videos, photosets, store, and so on. Let's take it nice and slow, one section at the time. Gotta finger the site slowly before I ram my whole goddamn fist in.

Right now, the livestreams section says Nothing Scheduled or some shit like that, but when one of these guys go live, you'll get to chat with them, tip them, ask for custom content and shit like that. You know how that shit rolls.

Webcam shows or whatever you want to call them, are fucking popular all over the goddamn world, and there's a big reason for it. You limp-dicked losers get to actually interact with the guy while he shows you his thick dick or raw fucks some twink till the poor bastard's hole looks like a blown-out tire. Bravo, vip.johnnytrigger.com! You fucking know what you are doing.

Now, the Stories stash is way busier. Thumbnails show previews, and yeah, the shit on vip.johnnytrigger.com really looks like proper amateur porn, and I mean that in the best possible sense.

I click on one of the thumbnails, and vip.johnnytrigger.com and its simple player show me a short clip of an ordinary dude spraying cum out of his mega cock. You can fucking tell that the guy is an ordinary bloke. He's a real perv, and real fans of porn dig that shit. The more time I spend here, the more I like it, and when I say that, you better believe my dick’s backing me up. Moving the fuck on.

I always prefer videos

I enter the site's videos stash. Damn, where do I fucking begin?! The first thing I want you to know is that vip.johnnytrigger.com is the fucking slickest amateur porn site I’ve face-fucked in a long goddamn while. Yeah, the thumbnails clearly show videos of all sorts of resolution, from grainy to pristine, but the site overall feels like a paysite.

The design is fucking spot on, and vip.johnnytrigger.com doesn't bother you with ads and shit like that. On top of that, I love that Johnny motherfucker adding a personal touch to the joint with that About Us shit with his pic attached. Really fucking awesome.

I can’t even tell you how many goddamn videos this motherfucker’s got. Johnny Trigger must be high as shit thinking an infinity scroll was some kinda fun fucking idea. Fuck yourself with that shit!

I can see videos getting dumped on this joint like clockwork, and the variety’s all over the place, but when it comes to actual numbers, not a fucking clue. I guess your only job is to keep scrolling that never-ending cock-sucking scroll until it finally runs dry. Not like you got anything better to do with your sad, lonely dick anyway.

It's easy to navigate and tame this beast

I've said all that shit about the videos and I still haven't streamed one. Damn, it's one of those slow mornings where I just can't get it fucking right, no matter how hard I try. It's just that I have a hard time focusing on shit when all I get are gays sucking off dicks. Maybe it's my straight, pussy-obsessed subconscious telling me not to stream shit. Like seriously, do I really have to watch dudes slobbering on each other’s cocks right now? Hell no.

The titles are some real brain-fucking masterpieces like Sucking Atticus, Milking David, Milking Emmett, Ethan, Callahan...yeah, real fucking creative there. I fucking love it when titles tell you jack shit about what’s actually going down. Johnny, did you get your brain mashed by a rusty dick or what? Just hire a decent content writer, for fuck’s sake!

I think I'm watching Emmett getting his dick sucked. You see, it's one of the premium videos, but you do get a trailer for free. It shows these two guys going wild in a simple living room. Both of the dudes look very normal. You know, not that classic gay shit with bleached hairs and long nails with teddy charms.

These two guys look raw and real, and that's exactly what makes vip.johnnytrigger.com fucking hot. Fetish and kinky shit always looks better when it’s amateur as hell, if you catch my drift. None of that polished, fake bullshit.

About the tips and VIP plans

If you want to watch Emmett getting his dick sucked, you'll have to unlock the video first. The individual price of that masterpiece is $5. It's a fair deal, but both you and I know that those individual purchases end up being pricier than VIP plans if you don't have control over your dick. You do you. Your balls, your rules.

Vip.johnnytrigger.com throws a shitload of subscription plans at your dumb ass, so let me break it down nice and fucking simple - $14.98 for 1 month silver plan (grab 5 videos a month), $29.95 every 60 days for 2-month silver (still 5 downloads), $41.98 every 90 days for 3-month silver... damn, your goddamn eyeballs work, so go fucking check it out. The annual silver plan, which lets you download 10 videos a damn month, is $162.98 every 365 days.

Then you got the gold plans - $24.98 for one month, $48.98 for two months, $134.98 for six months, and a badass $269.98 for the whole freaking year. That last motherfucker gets you unlimited downloads and early access to new uploads.

Look, vip.johnnytrigger.com slaps 10 VIP options on the table, so you can pick whatever fits your horny ass, but damn, writing about all this shit is exhausting and a pain in the cunt. Mad respect if you made it this far.

Sure I fucking approve

I fucking dig the site, no doubt, but that doesn't mean it's fucking perfect. Scrolling through that endless video shit is fucking tiring and some of those damn titles are Jesus Fucking Christ. “Sucking Atticus” and “Milking David”? Who the hell names this shit? Yeah, the content on vip.johnnytrigger.com is gay, and that shit ain't for everyone, as well as amateur porn. You have to pay for amateur content, and some of you fucks might not be into that.

On the other hand, vip.johnnytrigger.com is real. You get raw and gritty amateur shit. You know, dudes with real cocks, real balls, and real cum all over the goddamn place. These guys look like they could be your sketchy neighbor or that dude from down the block, not some over-groomed twink with sharp nails and pink hair. That’s the kinda porn that makes vip.johnnytrigger.com unique.

That motherfucker Johnny knows how to keep the site slick as hell. It's all free of ads. He offers 10 VIP plans, and that's always good shit. Depending on your subscription, you can download the flicks, and it's always nice when you get to keep them forever.

So yeah, if you want some raw amateur porn where dudes suck and fuck like they mean it, vip.johnnytrigger.com is THE stop. Jump in, get messy, and thank me later!